Hi and Welcome!

As I have been reading through dieting blogs for the last few months I noticed that few if any pertained to me and my struggles to lose 100 pounds in 2015. In an effort to hold myself accountable, and maybe help someone else in their journey I decided to start blogging my weight loss journey and my adoption of a healthy lifestyle. I'm hoping this blog will be memoir, recipe bank, and community as I lose myself in 2015!

I am

• 29 (I'll be 30 in June, which is my half-way point and impetus for this new me in the first place).
• Female
• 5'2- 5'4 depending on what gas station I'm leaving.
• 253 pounds as of January 5, 2015
• 223 pounds as of April 7, 2015 (Yes, I'm starting this 3 months and 30 lbs in.).

I decided to do this not as a New Year's Resolution, but because I was fat, single (mostly by my choice?), unhealthy, and unhappy. I couldn't touch my toes easily, my stomach stuck out farther than my breasts, and I didn't like myself very much. I felt like I had NO self control... my joke was that I had lots of will power, but no will not power. Food controlled me in a way I find increasingly disturbing. I had been over 200 pounds since the end of my sophomore year of college. My freshman 15 was really the sophomore 50 combined with a Junior/Senior 25. Both of my parents had undergone weight-loss surgery (one gastric bypass and one lap-band) with mixed results. I was seriously considering the vertical sleeve surgery myself... in fact I was waiting on my vestment with my work to qualify. That was a big one. I was continuing to be obese, making no attempt to be better, while I waited on a magic fix. 

In addition (I know, I know, like I needed more reasons than the above paragraph), I have always ridden horses... mostly competitively... and lately my abilities in the saddle were suffering because of my weight. My balance was poor, which meant my horses had to work double. In hand work was low quality or non-existent because I would get so winded. My weight was getting in the way of my passion, and I needed to fix it now- not in two years when I qualified for surgery. 

My excuses were plentiful and increasingly creative!

• I'm too busy- working 10-12 hours a day I NEED the Dr. Pepper just to survive!
• I barely have time to sleep- how am I supposed to add in meal prep and working out? 
• I LOVE to cook the fried, buttery food that I grew up with- how can I turn my back on that? 
• There's no such thing as a "skinny" cook.
• Fresh fruits and vegetables are expensive and spoil too quickly to use going to the grocery store once a month. Pre-packaged and frozen is the way to go. 
• I was openly hostile to friends that made healthy eating and regular exercise a dedicated part of their lives (Sorry guys... and am thankful and happy you stuck with me, and stuck by me through all of this.)
• It's in my genes to be in this size jeans... just look at my family. 

So yeah, that's where I started. A good place to start the blog I think. Tomorrow I'll catch you up on the last 3 months, and maybe a recipe. My love for cooking hasn't gone anywhere- I'm just changing up the ingredients.